Coffee and Karma
by KittyGoddess415
Summary: Open mic nights are dangerous, and make Puck want to set himself on fire. Puckelberry, K plus for language! COMPLETE!
1. Open Mic

**Coffee and Karma**

**A.N: **My first Gleefic. Be gentle!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee, or the Indigo Girls. You will see how the Indigo Girls are relevant momentarily. ;)

* * *

Puck hated coffee. He hated the smell of it. He hated the brown grinds in the trash. He hated the sound of spoons stirring. He hated that it made him think of waking up on Saturday mornings to the sound of his mother's laughter, of having a fa—well, yeah, he hated coffee. But he hated what it represented, what it reminded him of more. _I won'__t be that guy. I _refuse_ to be that guy, whether Quinn wants my help or not._

That's how he found himself behind the counter of the café, as he had for the past six months, wearing a fake smile and black baseball cap. It was twenty miles from Lima, far enough away that there was no danger of running into people he knew. It worked out well...for the most part.

_Damn open mic nights make me want to set myself on fire. But the tips are so much better. Damn it. _Stupid talentless hacks, wannabe chicks with guitars...he heard cats in heat that sounded better. But hey, it was a paying gig, and he didn't even have to break a sweat, so...

As the lights dimmed, he groaned. _Time for the torture to begin._ _Too bad I can'__t get away with earplugs._

"Ladies and gents, the reason you're all here tonight, theeeeeeeeeee open mic! We've got a newbie tonight, so be gentle. Especially since she's _hot_."

Puck rolled his eyes. Jay, his blonde skater stoner co-worker, was also the MC, and enjoyed it just a little too much. He turned to the espresso machine to fill an order, and was pleasantly surprised to hear an acoustic guitar begin tuning. _Huh. Much better than usual. Usually they don'__t even bother. _He turned with the fake smile again and handed off the espresso, glancing over at the stage. _Damn, can'__t even tell if she _is_ hot, her hair is in the way while she'__s leaning over the guitar. Nice guitar though. _He turned away and sat down behind the register, playing Madden on his iPhone.

The guitar picked up softly and a velvety voice quietly wound its way through the café.

_**"**__**There's a letter on the desktop that I dug out of a drawer  
The last truce we ever came to from our adolescent war  
And I start to feel the fever of the warm air through the screen  
You come regular like seasons shadowing my dreams**_..._**"**_

_Can_'_t be,_ Puck thought, as his heart dropped to his stomach. _Not fucking allowed to be._ He looked up to the stage, and the long brown hair was swept behind a familiar face, one that had no place in his café. _**  
**_  
_**"****The Mississippi's mighty, but it starts in Minnesota  
At a place where you can walk across with five steps down  
And I guess that's how you started, like a pinprick to my heart  
But at this point you rush right through me and I start to drown**_..._**"**_

Puck swallowed hard. _She can'__t...she wouldn'__t_..._it_'_s not about_...He pulled the cap lower over his eyes. _She broke up with me, damn it, we'__re done. She'__s probably singing about Finn anyway. _He turned his attention back to Madden, trying to block out the plaintive tone in her voice. Another voice wound through hers for the chorus.

_**"**__**And there's not enough room in this world for my pain...  
Signals crossed and love gets lost, and time passed makes it plain  
Of all my demon spirits I need you the most  
I'm in love with your ghost...  
I'm in love with your ghost**_..._**"**_

_Oh shit. __**Shit. **__Is that _Tina? _That means_...He scanned the crowd and spotted just what he was afraid of -- a wheelchair. Artie. _How the hell did I miss them all coming in?_ He glanced around furtively for other Glee members, but he found no one else in the audience. _Weird. _

Rachel looked out into space as she continued the next verse, Tina sang softly, almost whispering in the background, "don't tell a soul..."

_**"**__**Dark and dangerous like a secret, it gets whispered in a hush  
And when I wake the things I dreamt about you last night make me blush  
When you kiss me like a lover, then you sting me like a viper  
I go follow to the river, play your memory like the piper**_..._**"**_

Tina's added harmony emphasized everything he didn't want to hear, "kiss me like a lover," and "sting me like a viper" echoing in his ears. His own voice echoed in his memory as he remembered telling her "we were never friends."

_**"**__**And I feel it like a sickness how this love is killing me  
But I would walk into the fingers of your fire willingly  
And dance the edge of sanity -- I've never been this close  
In love with your ghost**_..._**"**_

Rachel's voice soared through the café as she poured herself into the vocal break, a series of "ooos" that sounded like her heart was breaking. He heard her voice crack, just a tiny bit, and his heart stopped. _She can__'__t possibly know it_'_s me. _Tina squeezed her shoulder as they started the next verse.

_**"**__**Unknowing captor, you'll never know how much you  
Pierce my spirit**_..._**but I can't touch you**_...  
_**Can you hear it? A cry to be free**_ --  
_**Oh, I'm forever under lock and key  
As you pass through me**_..._**"**_

Rachel quietly plucked at the guitar strings, lowering her face again.

_**"**__**Now I see your face before me, I would launch a thousand ships  
To bring your heart back to my island, as the sand beneath me slips  
As I burn up in your presence, and I know now how it feels  
To be weakened like Achilles, with you always at my heels**_..._**"**_

She looked back out to the audience, eyes suspiciously bright, as she and Tina harmonized.

_**"**__**My bitter pill to swallow is the silence that I keep**_...  
_**It poisons me, I can't swim free, the river is too deep**_..._**.  
Though I'm baptized by your touch I am no worse at most  
In love with your ghost**_..._**"**_

Tina picked up the refrain, singing "_**In love with your ghost,**_" over and over until Puck's chest was too tight to breathe. Rachel mourned, "_**You are shadowing my dreams,**_" alternately getting louder and softer, the guitar finally fading away into silence. As applause burst forth from the audience, Rachel, Rachel Berry, Ms. Broadway Spotlight, only whispered, "Thank you," into the microphone, before shrugging off Tina's hand and putting her guitar back in its case. She only shook her head at Tina, and left through the back door.

_Oh yeah. Back entrance. Damn it. Parking lot. Oh no. Parking lot?!_ _My truck_...

His worst fears were realized as he heard someone clearing their throat at the counter. Keeping the cap low, he stood and looked over to see Artie. _Of course it would have to be Artie. The only one who could see up into my face. Fuck._

"Hello, Puck," Artie said quietly.

***

Tina ran after her. "Rach, wait! Rach, come on, it's okay..." She looked around the dark parking lot, hearing Rachel's hiccupping attempts to cover her tears. "Rach?" _She wouldn'__t_..._would she?_ Tina cautiously approached the familiar truck and peeked into the truck bed. "Oh, Rach..."

"I told you it was his truck! I told you! I never should have...was he loo---did he—is he --Why does this always happen to _me_?" Rachel sobbed harder as she curled into a corner of the truck.

Tina sighed and thanked the powers that be that she wore her boots as she hauled herself into the truck bed next to Rachel. She rubbed Rachel's back in soothing circles. "Rach, it _was_ a good idea, and how the hell could we have known he works here? Who knows, he might've been on break right then. I didn't see him in there, did you?"

Rachel nodded her head as she gulped and gasped for air. "H-he was...I-I think it was...it m-might...be..."

Tina poked her in the side. "Stuttering was _my_ thing, Rach, get your own."

Rachel looked up as if slapped and subsided as she realized Tina was joking. "Tina, I've always...I've always been able to solve everything with music. I just...that song...it was so perfect, and I thought if I performed it, if I poured myself into it, I'd feel _better_, but then I saw him in the break before the third verse, and I'm sure it was him, Tina, I know because I felt my heart break all over again and then I kept going, hoping he'd look over or come up or something but my life's not a movie and I know that and I just can't..." She crumpled, pleading in a broken whisper, "It still hurts, so much, why won't it stop hurting?"

Tina gathered Rachel up in her arms and rocked her as she cried.

***

Puck cleared his throat. "Um, hey, Artie," he replied. "That was...uh..."

"For you." Artie looked up at him sternly. "You _know_ that song was for you."

Scoffing, Puck turned away on the pretense of wiping down the counters. "Yeah, well, whatever, she's wasting her time. How the hell did you know I work here anyway?"

"We didn't, actually," Artie answered.

Puck froze, cloth in hand. _Wait. She didn_'_t know_..._? Then why was she _here _of all places?_

"Rachel wanted to perform that song away from everyone, where no one would know what she was singing about," Artie explained. "She picked here because they had open mic and pretty much no one at school would come all this way for coffee. Probably the same reason _you'__re_ here."

Puck refused to turn.

"She saw your truck in the parking lot, you know. She recognized it immediately and wanted to turn around, but it was too late. My mom drove us and she was already gone. Tina and I didn't believe that it was yours, and we dragged her in. She must've spotted you."

"Right before the third verse," Puck muttered to himself. _I knew I heard her voice crack._

"Huh?"

"Nothing," Puck answered. He plastered a smirk on his face and turned to face Artie. "Well, it _is_ my truck, so point for Berry. Doesn't make a damn difference though."

Artie looked searchingly into his face. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess not. See you around, Puck." Artie wheeled away and out the back door in search of the girls.

Puck stared after him. _Whatever. It doesn'__t matter. We'__d never work out, she said so. _She _broke up with _me, _so what the hell is she trying to do anyway? She'__s over me, she never saw me as anything other than a Finn substitute. And she was just the nearest hot Jew. _ He snapped back to attention when two women approached the counter. "Two cappuccino, and one of those chocolate croissants, if you don't mind," the brunette ordered absently. "Nicole, I'm _telling _you, someone broke that poor girl's heart. She's so talented, poor thing..."

Puck's hand tightened around the lever for the foamed milk as her companion answered. "She definitely is talented, I'll give you that, but if she's that sensitive she'll never make it. Show biz is tough. Did I ever tell you I was in the Miss Ohio pageant? Fourth runner up," she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

He barely refrained from slamming the cappuccinos on the counter and gave them both a tight smile as they paid. His eyes drifted towards the back door and he frowned. "Jay," he called. His friend raised an eyebrow. "Can you cover for a few? Got to take care of something." Jay nodded and Puck skirted around the counter and out the door.

As he stepped outside, he looked around. _How hard is it to find a wheelchair, a goth chick and an overachiever? _He walked slowly through the lot, seeing no wheels other than the combustion-driven variety. He approached his truck cautiously, looking for any sign of damage or disturbance. _Where the hell could they have gone? _He narrowed his eyes as he rounded the truck bed, noticing four black scuff marks on the side. _Tina'__s boots maybe?_ _And four scuffs means in and out, probably._ He peeked into the bed and a small glint of gold caught his eye. _What the_...He reached in and pulled out a small pearl earring.

_Well hell._

***

Safely ensconced in Artie's van, Rachel sat staring out the window, trying not to cry.

* * *

**Musical note**: The song is "Ghost" by the Indigo Girls, from their Rites of Passage album. You can find it on YouTube if you want to hear it. And trust me, you do. :)

**A.N.**: Okay, so my first Puckelberry outing. I know I can do better, but I won't do anything without reviews...so, do I keep going?


	2. Gleek Emergency

**Chapter 2: Gleek Emergency**

**A.N.: **I just have to say how utterly overwhelmed I am by the response to this story!! Thank you first to all the people who reviewed, and here, my dears, is your continuation. And to those of you who signed up for story alerts – I am totally floored. Thank you, thank you, and thank you some more. I hope I don't disappoint!

**Disclaimer: **Mark Salling did not show up on my doorstep. So I guess I still don't own Glee.

* * *

Rachel finally turned away from the window and spun to face Tina and Artie in the backseat. "Thanks again for doing that with me, guys. I really appreciate it. Artie, you're an extremely talented guitarist and a patient and skilled teacher, so thank you for helping me learn that piece. And Tina..." Rachel smiled. "I'm so sorry I ever disparaged your talents, it was extremely unbecoming of me. It was my great pleasure to harmonize with you."

Tina slipped her cell phone back in one of her many pockets. "It's okay, Rach. You've come a long way yourself. I just wish that had gone better." She reached out to squeeze Rachel's hand.

Tears sprang to Rachel's eyes again and she swiped at them. "Thanks, but this will just be further reference for my acting career. It's just not meant to be."

Artie looked at Tina, concerned. "Is Rachel Berry actually giving up?" Artie teased.

Rachel plastered on a smile. "Ha...only because it takes two to tango, and my partner isn't interested anymore. Why waste my time, right? You're only young once."

Artie looked at Tina and sighed as the van pulled up in front of Rachel's. "Thanks, Mom! I'll give you a call when I'm ready to get picked up."

Rachel turned to his mother with a watery smile. "Thanks again, Mrs. Abrams, I really appreciate you being willing to drive us." She swallowed. "And thank you for coming back so quickly," she added in a whisper.

Artie's mother reached out a hand to stroke Rachel's arm. "No problem, honey, I'm sorry things didn't go like you wanted."

Rachel smiled tightly and nodded, moving to open the door. _What the_... "Tina? What is going on here?"

Artie's mom came around the car to help with the ramp as Tina jumped out and opened Rachel's door. Grabbing her hand, she tugged Rachel out of the van. "No one knows anything, I promise. I just...figured you could use your friends."

_But I_...Rachel sighed as she got out of the car. "I didn't want anyone to know, you know that!" she hissed.

Tina pulled her towards the front steps. "I know, and they don't, I swear! I just texted that it was a Gleek emergency and to meet us here."

"You all right, girl?" Mercedes hopped down the stairs to meet them and took Rachel's other hand. "Do I _wanna _know?"

Tina shook her head. "No questions, just Gleekdom. I say...West Side Story? Or maybe Rent?"

Artie wheeled up. "Nope, I think this calls for some Chicago."

Kurt shook his head as he dusted himself off. "Darlings, as much as I love you all, Gleek emergency means only one thing – a classic. Guys and Dolls." He linked his arm through Rachel's, gently divested her of her keys and let them all into the house. "It's in my bag. Mercedes, if you don't mind?"

"On it," she said, heading to Kurt's Hummer.

Rachel let herself be led inside. Her fathers were out of town, thank goodness, which is why she'd picked this particular Friday night to put Project Exorcism in motion. This had been Step 1 on her list, but at this moment, she was even further behind. All she wanted was the chance to sing him out of her system, and instead he was standing in front of her. _Life can be so cruel._ But as she looked around and allowed the Gleeks to surround her, she had to genuinely smile a little. _But not completely. I never thought I could have friends like this._

"Want to talk about it?" Kurt asked.

She smiled even as her eyes filled with tears. "No," she answered honestly.

"Done," he nodded. He held his hand out for the DVD, somehow sensing Mercedes had joined them. "Honeybun, no questions for the Diva, clear?"

"Hmph. Yeah, fine...clear. But there _better _be some decent snack foods if I'm not getting gossip out of this."

Rachel giggled slightly. "You've got it. Sugar cookies or chocolate chip?"

***

Puck went through the rest of his shift in a daze, filling orders automatically, the pearl earring feeling like a lead weight in his right pocket. _Artie'__s full of shit. Rachel doesn_'_t want anything to do with me. She broke up with me, and when everyone found out about the baby being mine, she ran straight for Finn. _He refused to consider the possibility that the fact he'd acted like a total dick to her when she tried to be there for him -- when the whole school was against him -- might've driven her to Finn. _It'__s what she wanted. It'__s what she _always_ wanted. And why the hell would she bother with me anyway? I was shitty to her for years, and I'__m the shittiest best friend in the world. _No one_ would want to bother with me. _Even though she tried, that voice whispered again. _Shut up. I think I need to get laid. _

He smiled suggestively at the pretty brunette paying for her husband's latte, getting her number with barely any effort. "He's going back to work after this," she purred. "Call me." _There we go. I'__m still the cougar hunter. I'__ll call her after shift is over, get in, get off, get out. Simple._

When his shift was over, he pulled the crumpled paper from his pocket and threw it away without a glance. _That was way too easy. She probably has herpes or some shit. _He got into his truck, placed the pearl earring carefully on the passenger seat, and drove home.

***

"Thanks again, guys!" Rachel waved until the last car pulled away, then shut the door carefully behind the Gleeks. She turned and pressed herself against the door, sliding down slowly to sit on the floor, and hung her head in her hands and cried.

***

Sleep was hard to come by for both of them that night. She tossed and turned and tears streaked down her face, while Puck tore the sheets off his bed.

_She found him on the bleachers and sat down next to him. "__Noah? Is_..._I_..._are you all right?"__ She knew better than to ask if it was true. She already knew in her heart that it was. Even as she'__d broken up with him, saying he was in love with Quinn didn'__t quite ring true. Saying he was too focused on Quinn for the sake of his unborn child to give it a real chance with her – _that_, that__ seemed true. And so she didn'__t even ask him to confirm it, and her heart ached just a bit for knowing that she'__d seen him honestly. That his heart had tried, but had been too full with his daughter and his fight to get to her to let Rachel in._

_He flinched at the sound of her voice and fixed a sneer on his face. "__Fan-fucking-tastic, Berry, thanks for asking. You can go back to selling Girl Scout Cookies now. I'__m sure Jacob needs his daily wank fodder."_

_Rachel cringed at his crudeness. "__I'__ll take that as a no, then. Do you want to talk about it? You can, you know. Talk to me. It'__s all right. I know you may not want me to be your friend, but I am. And I'__m fully capable of remaining unaffected by whatever you might confess. Meditation has firmly grounded me and thus I am practiced in regulating emotions as necessary."_

_She looked up at him expectantly and the lack of any negative emotion in her eyes almost knocked his knees out from under him. 'Why doesn_'_t she hate me?'__ he wondered. '__She should. Finn stayed with Quinn because of me and that one stupid night. She could'__ve had him all along. It_'_s what she always wanted.'__ Aloud, he snorted. "__Damn, Berry, do I really seem that desperate that I would need to talk to you? I should just go roll in the mud and try to get into Pillsbury'__s office. At least she smells lemony fresh."_

_Rachel frowned tightly. "__You aren'__t going to make this easy, are you."__ She sighed and tapped her foot impatiently. "__Fine. If that_'_s what you want, fine. I just thought you could use a friend. And I never stopped being yours, Noah. Not once, no matter how much you tried to make me hate you. You'__re not the same guy who made that mistake with Quinn. I know you'__re not. You'__ve grown up, and you know it. She knows it too. So I guess it'__s really all up to you, isn'__t it."_

_The next day, he threw a Slushie at her, just to see if he could. He ignored the twisting pain in his stomach when he saw the hurt and betrayal written on her face. _

_When Quinn found him that afternoon and asked if he was__ still willing to be there for the baby, naturally he agreed. She swallowed hard and explained that Finn said he couldn'__t lie for a baby that wasn'__t his and was turning in the wheelchair and quitting his job. She needed him, for real, and when he saw the tears in Rachel'__s eyes as he walked into school with his arm around Quinn, he pretended it didn_'_t matter. If he never threw another Slushie at her, never even met her eyes, it wasn'__t because he felt like a gigantic ass, it was to save money. For the baby. That was all._

_That was all.  
_

***

Puck's eyes snapped open and he punched his pillow in frustration. _Fucking Berry. Fucking_..._Rachel_..._Aw, shit_...Puck punched his pillow harder as he pictured her lips on his, her hair tangled in his fist, and struggled to find sleep again. _Should'__ve just banged that cougar, damn it. What does it matter that she wouldn'__t have tasted of strawberry lip gloss and the honey she puts in her tea? What the fuck? Am I a girl? _He pictured Rachel's deep brown eyes gazing up from around his waistline and.._Yeah, not a girl. Good. _He closed his eyes and twisted, trying to find a comfortable position. _Maybe not the best thing to think about. Shit._ He tossed and turned and finally retreated to the bathroom. _Lame, Puckerman. Get a grip. _He smiled lecherously in the dark._ Heh. Well, yeah, I'__m about to. _

***

Rachel sat up in bed, touching her cheeks to find them cold and wet. She groaned as she fluffed her pillow. _I tried so hard to be there, and he just pushed and pushed and pushed_..._Then Quinn ran to him, and I just_..._of _course_ Finn and I would try. If only he were enough, if _we_ were enough_..._But there was, nothing, really, we both just wanted to be that fairy tale, but that'__s all it turned out to be. '_..._a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.'__ Thank you, Sir William Shakespeare, for that. And I watched it all fall apart with him and Quinn last month, and still nothing. Nothing. Quinn and Finn somehow agree to work it out, miracle of miracles, but I didn'__t even exist. _She lay heavily back on the pillow and pulled her mask back over her eyes. _It'__s enough already. That'__s thirty days too many trying to get him to acknowledge my very existence. So he heard me tonight. So what. He probably doesn'__t even believe I give a damn about him, the stubborn cad. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life. _

She tossed and turned, but never fell back asleep.

***

Kurt huffed out a sigh and sank back down onto Artie's couch. "She's not answering. Do we just show up?"

Mercedes rolled her eyes. "Why does Crazy have to make it so hard for us to be her friend? Do you have _any _idea what happened?"

Kurt shrugged. "I could only guess it has to do with Tall, Dark and Neanderthal. Concur?"

Mercedes narrowed her eyes at Tina. "Will you just spill already?"

Tina shook her head vehemently. "I promised! And I can't break a promise, I already lied to all of you about something major. Uh-uh."

Artie sighed. "Besides, what difference would it make if it was? Puck's being an ass, and no one can stop him."

"Finn could," Kurt suggested. "He might be the only one who has a chance."

Mercedes laughed. "Oh, that should go well. Hey Finn, could you set up your girlfriend's baby daddy with your ex-girlfriend? That'd be great, thanks."

Crossing his arms defensively, Kurt protested, "Finn is a good person. He wants Rachel to be happy, even if he isn't Puck's biggest fan."

"Honey, _no one_ is Puck's fan right now besides Crazy. He's pricklier than a porcupine on a cactus. The boy doesn't _deserve_ her, we need to get her moving _on._"

"Well, we can't do _anything_ until she answers the phone, right?" Kurt asked. "We couldn't, say, show up on her doorstep and ring the doorbell until she answers?" He watched the smiles bloom on everyone's faces and nodded smugly.

"Hey, Mom?" Artie called, "Can you give me a ride?"

***

Puck sat in his truck, parked down the block from Rachel's. The cab was starting to get cold, but he couldn't bring himself to move. _What the hell am I doing here? _He glanced over at the earring on the passenger seat, drumming his fingers on the wheel. _I can just leave it in her damn locker. So I remember her combination, so what? It'__s good if I want to really mess with her. That'__s why. _He clenched his hands on the wheel. _Fuck it. I'__ll just throw the damn thing in her face and –_

His hand stilled before turning the key as he watched Artie's van pass him, Kurt's Hummer right behind. And he wasn't being a stalker by watching them pile out of their cars, and it didn't twist a knife in his heart to watch her open the door as Kurt pounded insistently on it, his cell phone to his ear. And he didn't give a rat's ass that every last one of them gave her a lingering hug, like somehow her heart was broken. And if he waited until the door closed behind them before driving away, it was only because he needed to warm the truck up, not because he was afraid he'd knock on her door too. The truck wouldn't run well if it didn't warm up.

Yeah. That's it.

* * *

**A.N.**: This is probably going to wrap up pretty quickly. I hope it's not too fast and that you all enjoy it. It's just so clear in my head, I can't stop writing! LOL. Review please?? :)


	3. Conscientious Objector

**Chapter 3 – Conscientious Objector**

**A.N.:** This is kind of pouring out of me, so I hope you don't mind the frequent updates! In case you haven't figured it out, this is AU in the future, so in my world, they've already won at Regionals and are preparing for Nationals, okay? Thanks.

**Disclaimer: **Yeah, still don't own Glee.

* * *

Puck closed his right fist around the pearl earring, a Slushie in his left. He just needed to do it, he needed to bring balance back to the force and all that crap, and just throw the damn Slushie and drop the earring. Simple. He could see it. He'd just walk down the hall, toss it in her face, drop the earring at her feet, smirk and walk on. He was the original badass. There was nothing to stop him. _Nothing at all. I'__m still Puck, and she'__s still Rachel fucking Berry. I am not a nice guy. _No matter how much you want to be, an inner voice challenged. _Shut up. _And so what if he was there early, when the school was so empty it would give her plenty of time to clean up the mess, and no one would ever know? It was just because he had stuff to do before school. It wasn't because of the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach that told him this was wrong, that it would kill any last bit of caring she might have for him. _And if it did, that was just bonus._ Keep telling yourself that, Puckerman, that quiet voice in his mind taunted. _What the fuck, am I growing a conscience? I don'__t have room for that shit._

He lengthened his stride, quickened his pace down the hall. _It'__s, like, survival of the fittest. _

Rachel heard familiar footsteps heading in her direction in the near empty hallway. _He wouldn'__t be so cruel. If he is_..._if he does_..._then I know that my Noah was a mirage, that I didn'__t really know him at all. If he does, at least I know where I stand. _She turned to face him, and her heart clenched at the all-too-familiar look in his eyes. _It'__s really over._ She took a slow, deep breath and waited for the shock of cold.

_Fuck. _He caught her eye and faltered. _She looks so damn_..._wounded. Fuck, Puckerman, what are you going to do?_ He swallowed hard, smirk firmly pasted on. _What am I going to do? I'm gonna Slushie the freak.__ That's who I am, I'm Puck, I'm top of the food chain, and she's the bottom. _He ignored how his chest got tight at the thought. _This is how it goes._

As he got closer, her eyes stayed locked on his. _"You're not the same guy who made that mistake with Quinn. I know you're not," _her voice whispered out of his memory. _Shit._ _Shit, shit, _shit. He walked right past her and dropped the Slushie in the next garbage can, slamming his right fist into the locker next to it. _Fuck. Damn it, that _hurt_. _Fuck!_ I think I_...He opened his hand to see a red pinprick and a droplet of blood in his palm from the earring. _She fucking gets to me without even trying. Shit._

Rachel stared blankly after him as he charged down the hall. _Noah..._

***

"Okay, guys, listen up! I think we've come a long, long way since the beginning of the year. I'm really proud of all of you. I know it hasn't been easy. But, that being said, I think...I think you're all ready to take this to the next level. The ultimate challenge of a Glee Club. _A capella_." Will started passing out sheet music.

"Ah ka-who-wuh?" Finn asked uncertainly.

"_A capella. _It's Italian. It means 'from the chapel' or 'from the choir,'" Will explained. "It's singing without any instruments. No piano, no guitar. You guys keep it in key on your own."

Rachel looked down. "Billy Joel?" she questioned. _Of all songs, _this_ one?_

"Yes, Billy Joel, but this a capella arrangement is spectacular. I performed it and it always got chills. It's what's going to win us Nationals."

Rachel nodded with a tight smile. _Lovely. My breakup song. At Nationals. My life is officially a Greek tragedy._

Kurt squeezed her hand. "Rach, honey," he whispered urgently. "Want me to talk to –

She shook her head, squeezing back. "No," she protested. "No, it's fine. It is, I swear."

"Rachel?" Will interjected. "Everything okay?"

"Of course, Mr. Schue," she said brightly. "I, uh, I know this song quite well," she said. _Damn it, my voice cracked._

Puck's ears perked up as he heard the slight quiver in her tone. _Something about this has her rattled, _he guessed. As they ran through the song and he heard the lyrics, he couldn't help but wonder if Artie wasn't full of shit after all.

***

"Rach, are you –"

"I'm _fine_, Tina," Rachel bit out between clenched teeth. She took the longest strides she could away from the Music Room. _I swear, I love them, but if they don'__t back off I'__m going to _scream_. _"I can sing this song, it's all right. I must prepare myself for performing through adversity and discomfort, and this is the safest venue in which to explore that. Mr. Schuester is actually affording me an invaluable opportunity, one which I intend to take full advantage of."

Tina sighed theatrically before poking Rachel hard in the shoulder. "You're full of it, but you know that, so I'll just back off and let you stew. When you're ready, I've got more angsty chick music."

_Thank goodness for that_... "Tina, I don't know if I can thank you enough for helping me broaden my musical repertoire. The contributions you've made to my collection are positively cathartic, and have considerably assisted in my emotional progress to this point. I'd be most grateful to sample any selections you think might be appropriate." Rachel added, shyly, "If you don't mind, that is."

Tina nodded happily. "Something I can do! I'll have a mix for you probably by the end of the day."

Rachel smiled gratefully. "Thanks. And, um...sorry. I know I don't make it easy to help. I'm so accustomed to being a soloist, it's difficult to rely on the ensemble in times of extreme stress."

Tina rolled her eyes. "We get it, that's why we chase you down. Just run slower, okay? Or at least let us know where you're going." With a grin and a bump to Rachel's shoulder, Tina skipped down the hall to catch up with Artie.

Rachel stopped in her tracks and leaned heavily against the lockers. She closed her eyes and squeezed her temples with her left hand. _I think I want to go home right now. Just curl up on my couch and watch West Side Story. _She straightened with a sigh. _But I won'__t. Because I'__m better than that. This is just reference material on teenage heartbreak. I'__ll take it, I'__ll feel it, I'__ll absorb it into my bones_..._and then I'__ll let it go. _

Puck watched her quietly, pushing off from his perch against the wall. _The fuck is up with her? _he wondered. _Angsty chick music? And is she actually gonna be late to class?_ When she straightened, he thrust his hand into his pocket. _Let'__s get this the hell over with, so I can stop thinking about it. _"Hey, Berry," he called as he walked quickly to her side. "You dropped something." He grabbed her left hand and dropped the earring in it, not even checking to see if she'd closed her hand around it as he kept going. _Now back to our regularly scheduled programming of responsible baby daddy by day and cougar hunter by night._

But he heard her breath hiss in, and her heels running in the opposite direction, even though he knew her next class was further down the hall from his. You used to walk her, that annoying inner voice reminded him. _Whatever. I don'__t give a shit._ He stalked into his next class, slamming his textbook on the desk so loudly that the teacher jumped, startled.

_I don'__t._

***

"Yo, Beyonce!" Puck called, watching Kurt round the corner at the end of the school day. Kurt frowned but stopped as Puck jogged up to meet him. "What the hell is with Berry?"

Kurt burst into laughter. "You're joking, right?" he asked disdainfully.

Puck shoved him lightly. "The hell, dude, why would I be joking?"

Kurt shoved his sunglasses on and lifted his chin. "Because you have given less than a _shit_ about her over the past month as she slowly withered away." Kurt articulated the word "shit" so sharply that the "t" stabbed Puck in the heart. "Why on earth would you notice _now_?"

Puck watched, stunned, as Kurt started walking away. "What the hell do you mean by that?" he called after Kurt.

"Oh, come off it, not even _you'__re_ that stupid." Kurt stopped and turned around, tapping his foot impatiently as he peered over his glasses, framed in the fading afternoon sun through the glass door. "Haven't you noticed the Diva has been less than herself? Pay attention for about five minutes and it's as plain as the abs on your abs." Kurt settled his sunglasses on his face and flounced away.

***

_I still don'__t buy that it'__s _me_ she'__s missing,_ Puck scoffed to himself. _It'__s _always_ been Finn. _So if he watched her over the next two weeks, it was only like, watching a train wreck. You had to see what happened. Even when it was ugly and made you want to set yourself on fire. Because you know you caused it_,_ his fledgling conscience whispered again. _Shut up!_

_It must be Quinn and all her freaky hormones,_ Puck told himself. _I'__m only noticing shit because if I didn'__t with her she'__d hit me. I'__m still a badass. I'm just a _smart _one. _Thus affirming his masculity, he was able to allow himself to notice that Kurt was _right_. Rachel _wasn't_ herself.

Thanks to Tina, she warmed up to freaking slit your wrists music, like Tori Amos and Counting Crows. No more musicals, no more Celine Dion._ It was freaky. Like the Energizer Bunny running out of juice._

The gold stars were gone, the size of her signature shrank. _It was like she really __was fading away, like in __Back to the Future, how Marty was disappearing because his parents never met.  
_

One rehearsal, Mercedes shot him a dirty look from across the room when Rachel asked her to warm up to india arie's "Ready for Love". Another found Artie and Tina dueting on an acoustic version of Seether's "Broken." He nearly lost his shit when Quinn and Finn sang "Go Your Own Way."_ Because really, it was totally wrong to butcher Fleetwood Mac like that._ He refused to listen to any more warm-ups after that, instead watching Rachel herself.

He shook his head as she warmed the girls up with some song about how she needed it to hurt. _What the fuck? It'__s like she'__s picking the most depressing songs possible for everyone. Where are the wussy show tunes? The sappy love songs? _Puck frowned as he considered Artie's words, and Kurt's. _It'__s about Finn, damn it, I'__m sure it is. _He swallowed hard. _It _has _to be._

Finn spun a chair around and sat next to Puck. "S'up, dude," Finn greeted him.

Puck nodded and continued his absent observation of Rachel at the piano.

Finn cleared his throat. "So, uh, how're things? You know, with..." He nodded towards the piano bench.

"What, _Berry?_" Puck scoffed and tore his gaze away to stare out the door. "There's _nothing_. There never was."

"You're wrong, dude," Finn protested. "Rach..." He cleared his throat. "She, um...I heard her say 'Noah' in her sleep. It's...it's part of what broke us up, to be honest. We both realized we were forcing it, and we really wanted other people."

_What the hell was she doing asleep around you? _Puck's fists clenched of their own accord before he caught himself. _Whatever. Like it matters. _You know it does, whispered that voice again. _Shut. the. fuck. up. _"Give me a break, dude, she was hung up on you from your high B or whatever."

"And I was hung up on Quinn." He smiled over at her, pregnant and glowing as she sang. He clapped a hand on Puck's arm, squeezed it in gratitude. "Rachel's not stupid, and she's not a user. She really cared about you, man. She wouldn't have even dated you if she didn't."

"That's why she ran right for you when it all came out about me and Quinn. Right." I'm_ not stupid either._

Finn scoffed. "You guys showed up together, so we just kinda got together too. Dude, we were both...you know, _heartbroken_ and stuff."

Puck smirked. _Good to know he'__s still Finn. Eloquent as always. _"And sticking your tongues down each other's throats fixed that. Got it."

Finn rolled his eyes and smacked Puck in the back of the head. "C'mon, man, if Quinn and I could make it back to each other, what the hell are you waiting for? She's been waiting for you ever since you and Quinn broke up."

_You'__ve got to be kidding me. _Puck turned serious eyes on Finn. "Dude. I get it that you're all happy and shit and think everyone in the world should be in love. That's fantastic for you. Good job. But for the _last time_, there is _nothing_ between me and Berry!" A dissonant chord at the piano snapped Puck back to reality...where other people were. _Oh fuck. Please tell me I didn'__t -- _Rachel abruptly shoved herself away from the piano and moved to the farthest corner on the opposite side of the room.

"_Damn it,_ Puck, you could've kept your voice down," Finn cursed. He stood and moved to cross the room to her as Will entered.

"All right, guys, line it up! Everyone, three lines up on the steps, let's run 'And So It Goes'. And be prepared to move – I am going to switch you around as we go through it to get the best blend of voices, okay?" He clapped his hands together excitedly, smile faltering as he saw the stricken faces of the Gleeks and Finn frozen mid-stride, halfway across the room. "Um...is everything—"

"Everything is _perfect_, Mr. Schuester," Rachel said brightly as she stood and crossed to her spot, front and center. "It's just the intimidation of an a capella performance. It's extremely taxing to form a cohesive voice, and the dynamics have to be perfectly uniform. It's a daunting task." The Gleeks reluctantly took their places around her, Finn reaching out a hand to squeeze her shoulder. Something in Puck's chest twisted as he watched her violently shrug off Finn's hand. "Don't," she hissed stonily. "Just _don't_, Finn."

_Shit. He _can't _be right. '__Cause if he'__s right, I'__m the biggest asshole in the world. _

***

_**"And every time I've held a rose,  
It seems I only felt the thorns...  
And so it goes, and so it goes...  
And so will you soon I suppose..."**_

She poured her heart out into the lyrics. The constant tension, the rise and fall of the song, swept through her, rubbing her raw. _Get over it, Rachel. _He_ certainly has. _She closed her eyes as the melancholy rose in her, squeezing them shut tightly to keep back the tears.

Will stood pensively before the Gleeks, listening for strength and weakness. He started shifting – Kurt, to the front, Mercedes to the side with Brittany. Finn to the middle, at the end. He frowned as he heard Rachel struggling to blend. _She needs a stronger male_...Will tapped his chin thoughtfully and moved Puck to behind Rachel's left shoulder. _That'__s it._ He smiled in satisfaction as he backed away to enjoy his handiwork, sitting in the last row of the music room and closing his eyes to absorb the sound.

If Will's eyes had been opened, he might've noticed Rachel's tears, though what he could've done about them was questionable. But he had done one thing right.

_**"So I would choose to be with you...  
That's if the choice were mine to make.  
But you can make decisions too...  
And you can have this heart to break..."**_

Puck looked over at Rachel's profile, watched the tears trail down her cheeks and felt like he'd been kicked in the gut. _Shit. Motherfucking shit. She doesn'__t want me. She never did. I'__m the fuck-up baby daddy, why the hell would she want me? _

Artie reached out his hand for Rachel's, and she squeezed it gratefully, accepting Tina's hand on the other side.

"Fix it, moron," Mercedes hissed from behind him. "That girl is the best thing that ever happened to you and you _know_ it."

Puck faked a lunge in her direction, but she only smirked. He knew there was nothing in his eyes behind it. _I am the biggest asshole ever. She really _is_ fucking distraught over me. Shit, I used one of her SAT words._ He shook his head._ Fuck. Fucking shit._ He smirked._ That'__s better. _He glanced at Rachel, still clutching Artie and Tina's hands. _Fuck. She actually gives a damn about me. _Even when no one else did, his growing conscience reminded him.

The idea came to him first. As he walked out of the Music Room, he realized he was going to need help and pulled out his phone. He swallowed his pride and did the one thing he'd never pictured himself doing.

***

Tina did a spit-take of her soda as she got the last of her books from her locker. "Um, guys, did you get...?"

Kurt blinked at his cell. "I just got a text from –"

"From Puck?" Mercedes held up her phone, frowning. "What in the world could he possibly need all our iPods for? I don't know if I trust that white boy with my music!"

Artie shrugged. "Only one way to find out what's up, right?" He read the text again. **Gleek emergency. Need help. Bring iPods. Mulberry Street. Ten minutes.**

**See you in ten**, Artie texted back. "Meet you there," he said as he sped out to the parking lot.

***

They got a booth in the back of the restaurant. He told them his plan, no sarcasm, just honesty. He asked for their iPods, and bit his lip as the silence dragged on.

"I know I don't deserve your help," he offered. "I've been a shit to pretty much all of you for most of our teenage years. I'm sorry you were all convenient stepping stones to Notorious Stud-dom. At least your suffering was for a good cause."

Mercedes slapped him in the back of the head.

"Ouch! Damn it." Puck closed his eyes, rubbing the back of his head as he remembered how Rachel's voice had broken as she'd sung at Open Mic. "Okay, _fine. _I fucked up. Royally. With Berry. I have to fix it," he muttered.

"Why?" Artie questioned. "I think you owe us that. I want to hear you say it out loud."

The Gleeks glared at him expectantly.

_Fuck it. I can do it on my own. _He rolled his eyes and moved as if to leave the table.

"Hmph." Mercedes raised an eyebrow smugly. "Figures."

"Are you questioning my badassness?" Puck sat back down. "Fine, you want to know why? Because she's the only good thing I had in my life. Because she wanted to be there for me and I was too much of a douche to think I deserved it. Because I _don't_. I _don't_ deserve her, I don't deserve your help either. But for some reason, I think...I think she still wants me. And if I can fix it with her...maybe I can be better than that." _Aw, shit,_ _I sound like a pansy. _Puck barely restrained the urge to bang his head against the table and struggled to breathe._ Damn it.  
_

Finally Kurt reached into his pocket and produced a leopard covered iPod Touch. "It's a good thing I keep a backup of my music. There's no way I'd relinquish my iPhone, not matter what you offered. Use it wisely." He slapped it into Puck's outstretched hand.

"Thanks, Kurt," Puck said sincerely._ Seriously. None of them would even _consider _helping me if you didn_'_t. _One by one, Mercedes, Tina and Artie parted with their precious music players.

Puck cleared his throat. "Thank you, guys...seriously. I don't deserve it."

"Mm-hmm." Mercedes took a sip of her milkshake, gazing at him in disapproval over her straw. "You're right, you _don_'_t_ deserve our help, but Ms. Diva doesn't deserve to be miserable either. I'm willing to sacrifice some hatred and resentment to get her back to...well, what _she_ considers normal."

Puck gave them all a rueful half-smile that had them smiling back. "Yeah...I know what you mean."

***

Rachel couldn't stand being in the house any longer. Her room was too quiet, and her thoughts were too jumbled. Not even posting her daily MySpace video provided any relief. No one answered her texts, though. _Where are they all?_ She grabbed her coat and keys with a sigh. _Well, may as well have dinner. _ "Dad! Daddy! I'm going out!" She smiled. _I'__ll indulge. Pizza. My vocal chords can take the dairy for one night._

***

"I'm telling you, try that one out," Artie suggested, waving a pepperoni slice. "I think it'd work out well."

Puck nodded around his grandma slice. "I will, dude, for sure." His gaze drifted towards the door. _Oh shit._ He dropped his slice to his plate. "Oh, fuck."

Rachel saw him sitting with the Gleeks and stifled a sob as she turned and ran out.

"Rachel!" Tina called, sliding out of the booth. She turned quickly to Puck. "A week, that's all I'm going to buy you. _Fix it._" She ran after Rachel as Puck lowered his head to his hands.

***

"Rachel, I swear there's a reason for what you just saw, and it's actually a good one." _Please, please believe me. _Tina grabbed Rachel's arm. "Please, Rach."

"What, are you all serenading Quinn? Singing a lullaby to their love child?" _That didn'__t sound bitter at all. _Rachel closed her eyes, struggling against Tina's grasp. "Just let me _go_, Tina."

Tina shuddered, refusing to relinquish her grip on Rachel. "Um, first, ewww, gross. Love child? More like 'drunken mistake they're not going to punish for it' child. You know that. And second, I'm your friend, Rachel. Trust me when I say it's worth it."

"But I –" _can'__t stand to be hurt by him and by you. I haven'__t got any defenses left._

"Do you trust me, Rach? Do you trust us, your _friends_, enough to know that we wouldn't try to hurt you?" Tina met Rachel's gaze searchingly. _Damn. Maybe she doesn'__t? _The look of hurt in Rachel's eyes tugged Tina's heartstrings. _She really _hasn't_ had many friends, has she?_

Rachel searched Tina's eyes. _She seems to truly mean well_..."I just – It's...Tina, it's hard, okay? I want to trust you guys but I'm still...primed...for betrayal. I can't think of any reason that could justify associating with him right now."

"I know you can't," Tina agreed, grabbing Rachel's hand and tugging her gently away from her car. "And I'm sorry. Believe me when I say it wasn't _my _idea. At all. I _do _have a good idea, though -- come out with me Friday night. I promise you'll feel better."

Rachel narrowed her eyes at Tina. "Where are we going Friday?"

Laughing, Tina tugged harder and tried to drag her back to Mulberry Street. "Nope, not telling. You have to trust me."

"It's not one of those cults, is it?" Rachel asked cautiously.

Tina snorted. "You're kidding, right?" When Rachel met her gaze seriously, Tina shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Only you, Rachel. It's not, but hey, that'd be a great experience to draw on for your future career, right?"

Rachel cracked a smile but planted her feet firmly. "I'm not going back in there, Tina."

"I bet you he's gone, you know."

Rachel scoffed. "Why would he care? He's probably in there hitting on the nearest cougar."

Tina slowly shook her head. "Uh-uh. Bet you he's not." She pointed her finger over Rachel's shoulder. "Especially since he's getting in his truck."

Rachel turned, disbelieving, and watched as he sped away. "Well...I...I guess I will, then."

Tina dragged her back with a smile.

* * *

**Musical note: **Extremely vague reference to the song the girls are warming up to is Emmy Rossum's "Don't Stop Now."

**A.N.**: Some of you might guess what's coming next. I don't care. I'm writing it anyway. ;) Hope you're enjoying!


	4. Speed Dating Hypnotist Cults

**Chapter 4: Speed Dating Hypnotist Cults**

**A.N.: **We're approaching the end of this, my Gleeks, one chapter, two at most, unless the angst bunnies stage a coup. :) Thank you again to everyone who's taken the time to review, and to those who have author and story alerted me. It's amazing to see, and I'm glad you're enjoying it!

**Disclaimer: **I _still _don't own Glee, but I heart the little Puckelberry wink they threw us tonight! :)

* * *

"Not even a _hint_?" Rachel pleaded. "Come on, Tina, please? How can I be adequately prepared for the insuing social interactions if you refuse to allow me to contemplate the circumstances to which I will be exposed?" Rachel's eyes widened with horror. "Tina, _please _tell me it's not speed dating? Because the probability that a male who is willingly participating in such an impersonal display is a less than savory character is extremely --"

Tina could no longer stifle her laughter. "Rachel!" she cried desperately. "Stop it! We are not taking you to speed dating, or slaughter, or a cult, or hypnotherapy. I swear, it's just us Gleeks hanging out on a Friday night. If you don't feel better by the end of the night, I promise I won't ever try to surprise you. Fair?"

_Damn it! I _hate _surprises like this. _Rachel sighed, flipping her hair over her shoulder indignantly. "Fine! But only because I am unfortunately certain that such ambiguity as to the nature of social outings is typical of teenaged interactions --"

"You sound like an alien sometimes, you know that?" Mercedes joined them at the lockers. "It's supposed to be _fun. _You _are _familiar with fun, right?" She raised an eyebrow.

Rachel blushed furiously. _I have to stop being so paranoid. These are _friends. "Yes, Mercedes, I am."

"Well, _good. _'Cause as far as you're concerned, that's all that's going on tomorrow," Mercedes said, glaring Rachel into submission.

"Ooo, and a makeover!" Kurt chirped excitedly.

"A...a makeover?" Rachel questioned. _Oh no. __**No.**__ A makeover, talking with Puck..._"You...you guys are setting me up, aren't you? Like a blind date? So I'll..." _So I'll finally leave him alone..._

Tina looked stricken and cast panicky glances at Mercedes and Kurt.

"Oh, oh no, you _are!_ Guys, come on, I can't! I'm not...I'm not ready!" She turned wide pleading eyes on each of them. "Guys, please, I'm sincerely appreciative, but it's unfair to force me to move forward--"

"What about Project Exorcism?" Artie questioned as he wheeled onto the scene. "I thought you were ready to close that chapter."

Rachel's eyes reflexively sought and found Puck at his locker down the hall and her throat tightened. _But he didn't Slushie me or humiliate me when he totally could have..._"I..."

Finn and Quinn strolled towards the Gleeks. "Hey guys, what's up?"

"Nothing," they all replied in unison.

Finn scratched his head as Quinn rolled her eyes. "You sure?" he asked.

"Absolutely," Rachel confirmed. "Nothing at all. Just talking about plans for tomorrow night."

"Oh, awesome! What are you doing?"

"I_ don't know_," Rachel said pointedly, glaring at her unrepentant friends.

"Something _fun,_" Kurt offered. "Something long overdue for Ms. Diva."

Quinn chanced a glance at Puck. _What is going on with him?_ _He looks like he wants to crawl into his locker and hide. _"Aren't you all late for Glee?"

"Aren't _we_ late too?" Finn said, confused.

Quinn shoved him away. "Yes, but I'm pregnant. I can be late. I'm going to the bathroom."

"Do you need me to wait for you?" Finn asked, turning a concerned gaze on her.

Quinn smiled genuinely. "No, I don't, but thanks. Just tell Mr. Schue I'll be right there, okay?" She kissed his cheek as she slipped out from under his arm.

The Gleeks scattered, leaving Puck alone in the hallway. He trailed down the hall after them but stopped short as a hand tugged him back and into...the girls room?

He smirked down at Quinn. "I thought that ship had sailed, but if you wanna be a port in a storm..." he suggested lecherously.

She smacked his arm. "Stop being an ass. What is going on with you and Man-" She stopped at the dangerous look in his eye and smiled, satisfied with his instinctive response_._ "_Rachel_," she finished. "And by the way, don't bother with 'nothing' after the look you just gave me." _Heck, I don't even have to ask how you feel -- you told me everything right there._

_Fuck. _He opened his mouth and closed it again.

Quinn smiled wistfully. "There's just something about her, huh? I..." Quinn sighed. "I thought you'd look at _me _like that, the way you looked at her. But it's _her_, isn't it? She brings it out in guys."

_Oh hell..._"Quinn..." Puck began.

She held up a hand. "Save it, Puck. It's..." She tilted her head thoughtfully. "It's actually okay now. I'm sure now that Finn really loves me, you know? He _chose _me, knowing..." She gestured down. "It makes it okay. He looks at me like that again. Like I'm something precious."

Puck dropped his gaze to the floor. "Quinn, you know that the baby is--"

She laid a surprisingly gentle hand on his arm. "I _know_, Puck. You're...you're a good person. You've really stepped up, even when I didn't want you to."

Some of the old familiar anger welled and he took a deep breath, locking it down. "Thanks," he said quietly.

"She saw that the whole time, didn't she?" Quinn asked. "Even when you were throwing Slushies in her face, she was willing to see if there was more to you than that."

"Nah...she just couldn't resist Neil Diamond, it's like a Jewish aphrodisiac," he smirked.

Quinn glared at him silently.

_Aw, fuck._ _Fine. _Puck ran a hand over his Mohawk. "I _wasn't_ a good person back then. When I..." He met Quinn's eyes. "When I found out about the baby...it was like a wake up call, you know? Like, I had a moment where I could choose to be a shit, or where I could really...be a man. And she was willing to give me a chance to do that. To be that." _Even when you wouldn't._

She searched his eyes, finding nothing but honesty. "I know I said this when we were trying to be together, but I'm sorry, Puck. I'm sorry for making you feel like you couldn't be anything other than a Lima loser. It was unfair."

He shrugged. "Like I said, I _was_, back then. That's what made me start caring enough to do better. I didn't _want_ to be a loser." He swallowed. "I didn't want to be my dad," he confessed. _How fucked up is this -- we slept together, made a baby, dated, and _this_ is the most honest conversation we've ever had. Figures._

"And you're _not," _Quinn reassured him. "You've been right there since Day One, no matter how much I pushed you away. It's...that's why I was willing to try. Because I knew you wouldn't leave me." She sighed. "But I knew your heart wasn't in it."

_And I _still _manage to sound like an ass. _"Quinn-"

"_Ugh. _Just..._let me_, okay? I knew your heart wasn't in it when I saw you looking at her like _Finn _used to. Those little glances, like she was too perfect, too good to be true. _That's _why you were with me. Because I wasn't -- I'm _not -- _perfect, and then _you_ could be not perfect too."

Ignoring the ring of truth in her words, Puck scoffed. "Yeah, right. Berry, perfect? Please. She's fucking _insane_."

"Yeah, yeah she is, but she's also driven and motivated and...sweet. I can't believe I just said that." Quinn shook her head. "She's got the rest of her life figured out, while the rest of us are still struggling to do our homework. It's intimidating." She narrowed her eyes at Puck and pointed a finger at him. "If you _ever_ tell her I said any of this, I will _kill _you."

Puck held up his hands in mute surrender. _Like anyone would believe me anyway?_

"She...she needs you, Puck. And I think you need her too." Quinn looked at him quizzically. "So what gives? What are you waiting for?"

"I'm not--"

Quinn narrowed her eyes at him. "Puckerman, if the rest of that sentence is you're not good enough for her, I'm going to smack you. You were good enough for me to sleep with and --"

"I'm not waiting anymore."

"Oh." _Huh. _Quinn scrutinized him, seeing a certainty in his eyes, a confidence, that wasn't there before. "No, you're not, are you," she said quietly, surprised. "Is that..." She smirked. "Is that what the Gleeks are in on? Rachel was freaking out about some plans for tomorrow night."

"Um, yeah." _I can't believe I actually asked them for help. _ Puck sheepishly rubbed a hand along his head. _This better work, or I just lowered my social standing for nothing... _

Quinn nodded. "Well then, I guess we're good. You go first. I don't want anyone thinking anything."

_Ha, like they don't already wonder? _Puck smirked. "Yeah, it _is _tough to resist the guns." He flexed, kissing his right bicep.

Quinn rolled her eyes. "With lines like that, it's amazing Rachel hasn't thrown herself at you," she deadpanned.

He turned to leave and hesitated. "She thinks I don't want her," he blurted. _Probably 'cause that's what you've told her and shown her over and over, asshole. Oh hell. I can't believe I just said that, to _Quinn. _I am a stud, I am a stud..._

"Then change her mind, dummy," Quinn said impatiently. "I know firsthand how persuasive and persistent you can be. Apply it here." She shoved him out of the way and walked out.

"Thought _I _was going first," he muttered, then followed behind with a sigh.

***

Rehearsal was surprisingly not awkward. _Definitely helped that Schue didn't run 'And So It Goes', _Puck mused. As he made a move to leave the music room, Schue nodded to him, a knowing look in his eyes. _On purpose? _Puck cleared his throat. "Um, thanks, Mr. S," he offered quietly.

Will smiled sadly. "You're my kids, Puck. I care about all of you. And I know enough to recognize when there's something going on that no one's telling me about. It has something to do with that song, doesn't it?"

Puck nodded shortly. "Uh, yeah, yeah it does."

"Wanna talk about it?" Will offered.

"Oh, _hell _no," Puck protested. "I don't do touchy-feely mantalk." _But..._He swung his guitar from his back. "But, um...maybe you could listen to something I've been working on?"

Will nodded, gesturing to the stool in the middle of the room. "My pleasure," he said, smiling.

Puck began to play.

***

Friday dawned bright and clear, to Rachel's chagrin. _No excuses about the weather and its adverse effects on my voice. _The day raced past and before she'd even registered it, she was packing up for the weekend.

Kurt appeared in front of her. "Ready for your close up, Ms. Berry?" he teased.

_Not even close. _She smiled half-heartedly. "I've heard my usual attire is unsuitable for tonight's venture, so _no_, actually."

Kurt smiled and cracked his knuckles. "That's why it's makeover time." He clapped his hands and Mercedes and Brittany appeared.

Rachel blinked. "Um, hi, Brittany." _And what on earth are you doing here?_

"Hey Rachel," she answered sunnily. "I heard Kurt say 'makeover' and I've been _dying _to get my hands on you. I hope..." Her voice faltered. "I hope that's okay?" she questioned.

"Oh, of course!" Rachel hurried to reassure her. "It's just--"

"Unexpected?" came Quinn's voice behind her.

Rachel whirled in panic. "I, um...yes?" _Am I in the Twilight Zone?_

Quinn nodded. "Good. Less resistance. Let's go."

Rachel turned to Kurt. "Wh-wha--" _She's coming with us?_

"Close your mouth, Man Hands, you'll catch flies," Quinn smirked.

Rachel narrowed her eyes angrily at Kurt and turned to Quinn. _All right, that's it..._"Quinn-"

"_Easy _there, Divalicious," Mercedes interjected. "Preggo knows I'll cut her if she gets out of line. There's a _lot _I could do that wouldn't hurt the baby, and she knows it," Mercedes continued, glaring at Quinn. "She was just getting it out of her system, _right?" _she said pointedly.

Quinn sourly nodded. "Yeah, sorry."

Rachel nodded, mildly appeased. "All right. I imagine the rest of you are riding with Kurt?" At the nods, Rachel smiled. "See you at my house, then." She turned, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she walked away.

"Think this'll work?" Quinn asked quietly.

"I can't see how it couldn't," Kurt replied, motioning the girls to precede him into the parking lot.

Quinn nodded. "I'm going to come with you tonight."

"Say _what?" _Mercedes questioned, stopping to glare at Quinn with her hands on her hips.

Quinn rolled her eyes. "If she tries to back out, I'm the only one mean enough to push her back in. I'm coming too."

Kurt frowned thoughtfully at the two girls. "I think perhaps she's right. A challenge from Quinn may well be the only way we can get her to go in there again."

"Wait..." Brittany looked at Kurt. "Again?"

***

Rachel sighed in frustration as she threw yet another rejected outfit onto the pile.

"You know, that is an unnaturally large collection of short pleated skirts," Quinn commented.

_My skirts are lovely, and a trademark. _Rachel stuck her head out of the closet. "Says the one who wore the same cheerleading uniform to school _every day._"

Quinn raised a sarcastic eyebrow. "Jealous much?" she asked sweetly.

Rachel took a deep breath but deflated as Kurt pushed past her into the closet. _Not worth it. _

Kurt gasped. "Oh, _honey! _You've been holding out on us!" He pulled out a pair of black leather pants. "Are you mad? How have you not worn these?"

Rachel's breath hitched. _Because I never got the chance..._"I...I meant to...I bought them..."

_Shit. _Kurt turned alarmed eyes to Mercedes. _Of _course _leather would be for Puck._

Quinn rose from the bed, snatched them from Kurt's nerveless grip and thrust them at Rachel. "Good. No better time to wear them. Put them on."

Rachel clutched the pants to her, eyes wide with uncertainty. _But I don't want--_

_"Now_, Berry!" Quinn ordered.

Flustered, Rachel moved to the bathroom to comply. _I can't believe I'm doing this._

Kurt cast an admiring gaze at Quinn, who reddened slightly.

"I was head cheerleader for a reason," she muttered.

Mercedes nodded approvingly. "So long as you don't forget what we're trying to accomplish tonight."

Quinn scoffed. "Yeah, like I care."

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Then why are you here?"

"Because everyone deserves a second chance, right, Quinn?" Brittany volunteered with a smile. "That's what you said."

Quinn self-consciously lowered her gaze to her hands.

"Well, I'll be damned," Mercedes said with a shake of her head. "There _is _something goin' on under all that bitchy."

Quinn cast a murderous glare in her direction as the bathroom door opened.

"Guys, I don't-" Rachel began.

Kurt held up a hand. "Don't speak. Just turn."

Rachel reluctantly spun a circle. _Please let them not be as perfect as I think they are_...

"Your butt looks _amazing _in those," Brittany whispered in awe. "You could be a Cheerio with a body like that!"

"Um, thanks, Brittany," Rachel said shyly. _How different life would be_...

Brittany nodded. "Now we need a top. And black heels. Or maybe red, or gold. Oooo, or boots!" She brushed past Rachel into the closet. "Try this," she called, passing a purple cowl neck top out to Kurt.

"Mmm, yes, do." He handed the garment off to Rachel.

She sighed and retreated to the bathroom, emerging a minute later. The room went dead silent. "What? Do I have something on my face? Is the blouse stained?"

Mercedes shook her head slowly. "Girl, you are _fine." _She grabbed Rachel's hand and pulled her to the full length mirror. "Check you out."

Rachel looked at the mirror. _Wow. _The top was silk, the cowl low enough to show a hint of clevage. The kimono sleeves hung loosely, motion making them shimmer. The leather pants were perfection, molded to her curves.

Quinn and Brittany came up behind her in the mirror. "Here," Quinn said, pointing down. "Those." Gold heels were sitting on the floor, and Rachel stepped into them gingerly.

Silence descended again as everyone absorbed the metamorphosis.

Brittany finally clapped excitedly. "Oh, makeup now!"

Rachel allowed herself to be led to her vanity, and Brittany went to work with the cosmetics, Quinn, Kurt and Mercedes offering occasional suggestions. After an interminable time, they all slowly backed away.

"Mmm-hmm," Mercedes smiled. "You are _fine."_

"Wow..." Rachel stared at her smoky eyes and rosy lips in the mirror. "I look..."

"Like sex on a stick," Kurt proudly declared. "Our work is done." He looked down at his watch. "And just in time too. We have to go."

Rachel grabbed her clutch and took a deep breath. "Are you _sure _this isn't a blind date?"

"For the last time, Crazy, it's _not_ a blind date," Mercedes sighed. "Why would we all want to come watch you and some stranger make awkward conversation?"

_Hmm. That's the first reassuring thing I've heard. _"I suppose that's true. Thank you, Mercedes."

Mercedes nodded.

"All right, chickadees, into the car, chop chop!" Kurt ushered them all out to his Hummer. If he said a prayer before getting on the road, no one noticed.

***

Artie and Tina looked around anxiously.

"What -- what if she chickens out? If she won't come in?" Tina worried, gnawing on a fingernail.

Artie bit into a cookie. "Kurt said he had it under control. We just have to trust him."

"Do you think she'll be mad?" she whispered.

Smiling, Artie grabbed the hand she was mangling and lowered it to the table. "To start? Maybe. But if the timing is perfect, not for long." When Tina's eyes widened in fear, Artie squeezed the hand he held. "Hey, I forgave you, she won't hold a grudge. You're very forgivable."

"Artie..." Tina sighed dreamily. "Thank you."

They clinked mugs as they watched the door.

***

Rachel narrowed her eyes at the passing road sign and felt her stomach drop. "Um...guys..."

Kurt merrily continued his rendition of Defying Gravity, subtly shaking his head at Mercedes. _Do not engage, _his eyes warned.

Brittany clapped as Kurt finished, and Rachel felt compelled to join in. _One must always be a gracious audience member. _"Guys?" she tried again.

"Single Ladies, Kurt, put on Single Ladies!" Brittany pleaded.

"Hmm," Kurt murmured. "No, we need something...else. More...anthemic."

"Boy, did you just trash on Beyonce?" Mercedes criticized.

"Single Ladies is...overdone, as an anthem. Plus, Beyonce has a ring on it now. Less fun."

"Oh, you have _got _to be kidding me! Beyonce is less fun because she has Jay-Z wrapped around her little finger? We should _be _so lucky!"

The debate raged back and forth as the miles ticked by, and if Kurt and Mercedes exchanged furtive smiles, Rachel didn't notice.

***

Quinn groaned and substituted her iPod for Kurt's iPhone. "Enough already! If I have to listen to you bicker about Beyonce, Whitney and Britney any more, I think I may throw up. I'm putting on _my _music."

"Kurt, where's your Touch?" Rachel asked, puzzled. "I thought you hated using the iPhone as a music player." _And considering you're just as attached to your music as I am, that is exceedingly odd._

Kurt met Mercedes' eyes in the rear view. "I was updating it and must've left it at home," he offered.

Rachel nodded as Quinn contemplated her playlists. _Hmm. I suppose that _is _possible._.._Though not for me, of course._

"Yes..." Quinn whispered as she hit play. Synth strings filled the car and then... "_**Hey hey! Bye bye bye!**_"

Kurt beamed at Quinn as Brittany started singing along. "Perfect!" he exclaimed.

Mercedes crossed her arms and rolled her eyes...and started singing along a verse later.

***

"_**Every word I say is true**_..._**this I promise you**_..._**Ooo, I promise you**_..." The Gleeks subsided into laughter as they screeched the lyrics.

And then Rachel realized exactly where they were.

She stopped laughing.

* * *

**Musical note: **Go get N'Sync's "No Strings Attached" if you don't know the songs in the car!

**A.N.: **Haha, I would apologize for being mean, except you have oodles of hints as to where they are. Hope to have the next, and possibly final, chapter out soon! :)


	5. Of Napkins and Nerves

**Chapter 5**: **Of Napkins and Nerves**

**A.N.: **Last chapter, hope I don't disappoint. :)

**Disclaimer:** Now that the boys are on the Sexiest Men list, I am beginning to despair of ever owning Glee. (tear)

* * *

_"No."_

Rachel uttered the single word and nothing else. She crossed her arms protectively over her chest. They all crowded the door she was supposed to exit from, but Rachel refused to look anyone in the eye. _I cannot _believe _after I pushed myself to trust them, they brought me _here! _They can do whatever they want, I am _not _going in there!_

"Rachel..." Kurt started, leaning back into the car.

"I said _no_, Kurt. I don't know if you know, but _Puck _works here. I am _not. going. in. _And especially not like _this_," she gestured down to herself. "He'll take one look at me and think I'm trying to get him back." _I've humiliated myself enough by accident, I refuse to do it on purpose!_

Mercedes looked around the parking lot. "Or he could not even be here. Do you see that piece of crap he calls a truck here?"

Rachel peered out the windows, still refusing to leave the car. _Actually, no. _"No, I don't, but-"

"I heard they have great pecan pie here," Brittany said. "And...I really want to hang out with you guys." She looked at Rachel pleadingly. "Can't we just get coffee and dessert and hang out? No truck, no Puck!"

"But..." Rachel's voice trailed off as she took a look around the lot again. "What if he comes later? _He _knows that _I _know that he works here, he'll _still _think I'm trying to get him back."

Quinn frowned. "Kurt, iPhone. Now." She held her hand out expectantly.

Perplexed, he gave it to her.

"Give me a minute," she muttered. She tapped and typed furiously. "Ha! Got it." She tossed the iPhone to Rachel. "There's a club, another 20 minutes from here. That's where we're going if he shows."

Rachel looked down at the phone and looked up at Quinn quizzically. "In your condition?"

Quinn scowled. "Thanks a _lot, _Berry. I'm not _dead. _I can have some fun, can't I?"

"Oh! Of--of course, that was terribly insensitive of me, Quinn," Rachel stammered. _This really _is _the Twilight Zone -- I just _apologized _to Quinn Fabray._

"There. Cover story done. Can we go in now?" Quinn asked impatiently. "I'm gonna need a bathroom really soon."

Rachel looked at the hopeful faces of her friends. "I..." She looked at the cafe, and felt her chest tightening as her breathing went rapid and shallow. _Is this what a panic attack feels like? _"I _can't_," she whispered brokenly. "I just...I _can't_, I'm so sorry, just...just go in without me, I'll call my fathers."

Kurt looked helplessly at Mercedes and Quinn.

"All right, listen up, Crazy, 'cause I'm only gonna say this once--" Mercedes began.

"Never thought I'd see the day you were chickenshit, Man Hands," Quinn interjected.

Mercedes' eyes went wide as Kurt held her back. "Let her," he hissed in her ear.

_"Excuse me?"_ Rachel said indignantly. _Why are you here again?_

"You heard me the first time. Chickenshit. Coward. Scared little brat." Quinn leaned on the door, staring Rachel down.

Tears sprang to her eyes as Rachel struggled to breathe, burying her face in her hands.

_Shit. _Quinn looked away and swallowed hard before turning back to Rachel with a sneer. "I thought better of you than that, Berry. You were more than happy to try to take my boyfriend, to take every solo in Glee, but a coffeehouse and a Lima loser have you running scared." _Come on, take the bait..._

"He's _not _a loser," Rachel whispered angrily, lifting her head to glare at Quinn. "And I am _not _scared. I just don't want to look...desperate, or pathetic."_ I've done that enough already_.

Quinn scoffed. "Do you go to the same McKinley I do? Been there done that, and looking a _lot _less hot than you do right now."

Rachel frowned darkly. "Thanks for that, Quinn."

She shrugged. "I'm just saying, for someone who wants to take the world by storm, you sure can't handle the slightest possible confrontation. So he might think you're trying to get him back. So what? You claim to be a performer -- so if he shows up, _act_. We'd play right along with you and you know it." She turned to everyone else. "Screw it, she wants to sit in the car? Let her. I have to find the bathroom." She brushed past them dismissively and walked into the cafe.

"Rach?" Kurt said softly, peering into the back seat. "Honey, what-"

_I can do this. I'm the best actress I know. It will be fine. It's coffee, and he's not even here_. Rachel took a deep breath, grabbed her clutch, and got out of the car.

"Yay!" Brittany cheered. She linked her arm through Rachel's. "Wanna share my pie? I can't eat too much, I have to keep my figure for Cheerios. Hey, have you ever thought about joining?" She kept a steady stream of inane chatter as she walked Rachel in.

Kurt smiled at Mercedes. "Told you we needed her."

Mercedes only raised an eyebrow. "You don't think _I _would've done the same thing?"

"Mercedes, as much as I adore you, you're kind of like a two-by-four. Quinn is a sniper. And Rachel is out of the car and in the café. I call this a win-win." Kurt linked his arm through Mercedes' and smiled. "Shall we?"

***

"Is that..?" Tina's voice trailed away as she pointed to the back door.

Artie choked on his coffee. "Was that _Quinn?_"

As if hearing her name she met Artie's gaze and smiled smugly. "Right behind me," she mouthed, as she made a beeline to the bathroom.

Sure enough, Brittany and Rachel entered soon after, Kurt and Mercedes not far behind.

"Over here!" Tina waved at them. As they sat, Tina let out a low whistle. "Looking Berry fine there, Rach!" she quipped.

Rachel blushed. "Thanks, Tina." She sobered, sighed. "For the record, Tina, if this is your idea of making me feel better, you can never surprise me again," she chastised her friend. "It took some deft manipulation by Quinn to get me out of the car." At the shocked looks of Kurt and Mercedes, Rachel smiled. "It took me until Brittany started chatting to realize how I had been tricked."

"The night's not over yet," Tina said, pointing her spoon at Rachel for emphasis. "That was the deal. And I'm glad Quinn was able to get you out of the car."

Quinn chose that moment to appear at the table. "What?" she asked, as everyone looked at her.

"Thank you, Quinn," Rachel said softly. _Yet another first -- being _thankful_ to Quinn. _Her voice grew stronger as she continued, "It is imperative that I learn to confront my demons and not shrink in the face of adversity and possible public humiliation." She stood. "Anyone need anything?"

"I'll come with," Kurt volunteered.

"Me too!" Brittany said. "I want to see what other sweets they have."

"Aw, screw it, me three," Mercedes announced as she stood. "Need anything, Quinn?"

Quinn sighed. "Coffee is bad for Drizzle, so maybe just a glass of milk and a chocolate chip cookie?"

"You got it," Mercedes affirmed. "And, um, thanks, for helping get her out of the car." She swiftly walked to the counter.

"You're welcome," Quinn said to herself with a quiet smile.

***

"Oh, gosh, I want _everything," _Brittany sighed. "Sue would _kill_ me."

"Well, we're _sharing_," Rachel reminded her. "So whatever you see, you'd only have half."

"You're right!" Brittany clapped her hands delightedly. "A slice of apple pie, warm, a la mode, and a mocha," she ordered. "Rach?"

"Um..." Rachel looked at the flavors of tea and coffee scrawled on the chalkboard. "A pomegranate tea."

"You got it," said the barrista. "Oh, hey, weren't you here like three weeks ago? For open mic? You played guitar and sang some chick song."

Rachel blinked. "Um, yes, yes, I was." _For about five minutes._

"You _killed. _People were talking about you all night," he said, turning his back to fill their orders. "Where'd you go after?" he asked over his shoulder.

"Such a gem as our Rachel has too many obligations to stay in one place for too long," Kurt smoothly explained. "You have _no idea _how far in advance we had to schedule this outing."

The barista turned back to them and nodded. "Cool." He smiled at Rachel, holding out her tea and a napkin.

She accepted it gratefully and glanced at the napkin, a bit of blue catching her eye. "Oh my goodness," she whispered. _Is that...?_ "I think -- Brittany?" Brittany looked down at what Rachel was pointing at.

"Oh my gosh!" Brittany squealed. "Rachel got a number, Rachel got a number," she singsonged.

"Shush!" Rachel laughed and looked around. Kurt and Mercedes crowded in to see.

"I could die happy," Kurt announced. "Our little caterpillar is a beautiful butterfly. My work is done."

Rachel ducked her head shyly. "Thanks, guys. Really." _I have really _great _friends._

The barista cleared his throat. "I, um...I hope you use it."

Rachel went crimson. _Oh no! He heard all that!_ "I, um..."

"No pressure," he said, holding out a hand. "Ryan."

"Rachel," she answered, shaking his hand. She glanced back at her friends, all grinning Cheshire cat smiles. _You're safe here, Rachel. Go for it. _She took a deep breath. "I guess you should give me another napkin since I can't use this one," she said flirtatiously, batting her eyelashes. _I can't believe I just said that!_

Ryan's eyes widened and he smiled. "Uh, sure!" He handed over a stack of napkins. "So there's no risk you might have to use it. At all."

Rachel blushed, smiled, and walked back to the table, regal as a queen. _Look out, world. Rachel Berry is _still_ a diva._

***

From behind the curtain to the kitchen, Puck glowered at Ryan. _What the fuck, dude? And she's...she's _flirting back?! Puck clenched his fists and turned away, thudding his head against the wall repeatedly. "Fuck," he swore softly. "Fuck!" He knocked his head against the wall a few more times.

"Dude, _chill," _Finn soothed, laying a hand on his shoulder. "She still thinks-"

"Yeah, I _know _what she thinks," Puck said. _You fail at life, Puckerman._ "I'm such a fuck-up."

Finn sighed and shook him. "Listen, it's like Quinn and me. I had to choose her, even when I knew I could have someone else really awesome. So think how much better it'll be when she picks you over everybody!"

Puck ran a hand over his head. "Yeah, I guess." He peeked around the curtain again. "She _does_ look smokin' hot." _How have I never seen those pants?_

"Yeah," Finn agreed. At the look in Puck's eyes, he held up his hands. "Dude! I'm just agreeing! I can look, right?"

_No._ He took a deep breath. _What the fuck is wrong with me? _"Sorry...yeah." He gazed at Rachel for a while longer. "What if..." He swallowed. "What if she doesn't believe me? What if she doesn't want me anymore?"

"Then you decide if it's worth it to keep trying," Finn said quietly. "It took a while for me and Quinn. Just...if it's worth it, you have to put yourself out there, you know?"

Puck looked at Finn and raised an eyebrow. "When the fuck did _you_ get so wise?" _'Cause we all know you're not the sharpest crayon in the box._

Finn smiled sheepishly. "I'm not. I'm just telling you what Rach told _me."_

_Um, what? _"Are you kidding me? Rach helped you get Quinn back?" _She's crazier than I thought._

Finn nodded, squeezing Puck's shoulder. "Dude, I _told _you. We got over each other _real _quick when we were going out. We tried, we really did...I mean seriously, she's an awesome kisser and everything, but-"

_And everything? What the fuck does 'and everything' mean? _Puck's entire body tensed and he roughly brushed Finn's hand off his shoulder. "Finn," he started, voice low and angry, "I need you to stop talking now." _I don't. want. to know. _

"Huh?" Finn scratched his head, looking at Puck in confusion. "Why? I was just saying..."

"Dude! Seriously!" Puck fumed, trying to drown him out. _Don't make me knock your ass out._

"...that we never got too far."

"Oh." _Praise Adonai. Aw, _shit_. I'm so relieved, I'm _Jewish _with it._ Puck sighed, rolling his neck and shoulders.

Finn laughed. "_Wow. _You've got it _bad._ I didn't think I'd ever see the day when you got jealous over a girl."

Puck snorted. "Dude, not even _close _to the first time." _Did you forget the whole impregnating your girlfriend?_

"Oh really?" Finn challenged. "Then why didn't you fight me for Quinn? When you found out, you went right along with her lie. You didn't _like_ it, but you sure weren't going to deck me in the hallway." Finn slapped Puck on the back. "Face it, man, you're a goner."

Puck peeked out through the curtains again, and watched Rachel laughing. _Shit. _His hands twitched, and he swore he could smell strawberries and honey. "Gimme the guitar."

***

Rachel laughed and sipped her tea as Brittany, emboldened by the presence of Tina and Artie in addition to Kurt and Mercedes, decided to pick up the Beyonce/Whitney/Britney debate.

"And, you know, it's not just because of her name, I think Britney has it the toughest out of all of them! She was really young, and then Justin broke her heart—"

"Child, _please._ Britney broke her _own_ heart, didn't you hear she cheated on Justin with Wade Robson?"

"The choreographer on So You Think You Can Dance?" Brittany forked a piece of the apple pie as she leaned forward.

"_Mmm-hmm!_ He was the choreographer for N'Sync, and choreographed himself into them pants!"

Brittany gasped. "Wow! I can't believe that! I'd pick singing over dancing every time."

"Right there with you, girl," Mercedes agreed, high-fiving her.

"What about you, Rach?" Tina asked with a sly smile to the Gleeks. "Singing or dancing?"

"Oh, singing, obviously. There's nothing more compelling than the pure expression of human emotion conveyed through song." She stirred her tea, staring down into the cup, as she finished softly, "It tears away the masks one wears, if one sings the right song." _And when I say tear, I mean tear – slowly and painfully. _Her gaze turned sad and wistful.

Tina and the rest exchanged hopeful glances around her.

"Hey guys!" Finn approached the table from the back door, smiling. He grabbed a chair and spun it backwards next to Quinn, kissing her on the forehead as he did so.

Rachel sighed and smiled half-heartedly. _I miss that. Just something that...simple. A kiss. Just because. _She stared down into her tea again.

Finn looked up and nodded furiously. "Go!" he mouthed.

_This is it,_ Puck thought, as he crossed from the kitchen to the stage. He stared at the slump of her shoulders. _I have to fix it. I have to. I'__m the man. _He crossed to the stage, plugged in his guitar. _I'__m the man that_'_s scared as shit._ He blew out a breath.

_Huh?_ Rachel jerked upright at the sound of the amp picking up, glancing up at the stage. _Oh my goodness. Is that..._"Noah?" she breathed. _He can_'_t possibly..._

He strummed the guitar lovingly, and began picking out a longing and melancholy melody. With another deep breath, he began to sing.

"_**Well I have been searching all of my days  
**__**All of my days…  
Many a road, you know,****  
I**'__**ve been walking on  
All of my days...  
And I**'__**ve been trying to find  
What**'__**s been in my mind  
As the days keep turning into night…**_"

He looked up, catching her eyes. _I_'_m sorry_, he told her silently. _I'm an ass. _He held her gaze as he continued.

"_**Well I have been quietly standing in the shade  
****All of my days  
Watch the sky breaking on the promise that we made  
All of this rain…  
And I**'__**ve been trying to find  
What**'__**s been in my mind  
As the days keep turning into night…**_"

Rachel stared, mesmerized. _For...for me? _She looked around at the hopeful and joyful faces of her _-- their -- _friends. _Oh my gosh, _all _of this? _She looked up at Noah. _For me?_

"_**Well many a night I found myself with no friends standing near  
All of my days…  
I cried aloud,  
I shook my hands,  
What am I doing here?  
All of these days…  
For I look around me…  
And my eyes confound me…  
And it**_'_**s just too bright,  
As the days keep turning into night…**_"

He smiled softly at her, seeing the tears in her eyes. _Aw, damn it, Rach...don'__t _cry_. _He gave an arrogant nod, and a trademark Puck smirk, teasing a watery smile out of her. _Better. _The smirk quickly faded back to Noah's smile as he picked up the next verse.

"_**Now I see clearly,  
It**'__**s you I**'__**m looking for,  
All of my days…  
So I**__** smile,  
and know I**'__**ll feel this loneliness no more,  
All of my days.  
For I look around me,  
And it seems you**'__**ve found me,  
And it**'__**s coming into sight,  
As the days keep turning into night.  
As the days keep turning into night…**_"

_That'__s my Noah, _Rachel thought joyfully, tears and laughter shaking her shoulders. _The boy who wouldn'__t sing a solo is standing there in front of his friends and co-workers. For me._

He took a deep breath, his eyes staring deeply into hers. _Believe me, Rach._

"_**And even breathing feels all right  
Yes, even breathing feels all right  
Now even breathing feels all right  
Yes, even breathing  
Feels all right…**_"

He strummed the last chord and stepped down off the stage while the sound of it hung in the air. He stood uncertainly before Rachel. "Hey," he said quietly. "You look...you look amazing," he continued with a smile.

She looked up at him. _Noah..._she sighed to herself. She slowly and deliberately pushed her chair back from the table, stood, and stared him dead in the eyes.

_Is this...good?_ Noah wondered.

Rachel Berry glanced at her friends, smiling and silently cheering them on. _Our public awaits..._

She reclaimed whatever portion of her divadom she'd lost in one fell swoop, as she hauled Noah to her by the shirt collar and pressed her mouth to his.

_Oh yeah..._very _good, _Noah sighed to himself, and kissed her back.

* * *

**Musical note:** The song is "All My Days" by Alexi Murdoch, from the "Away We Go" soundtrack. Sweet, funny, honest and heartwrenching movie. Highly recommend it!

**A.N.: **So there you have it, my first foray into the world of Gleefic. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, and to those who author and story alerted me! Hope you enjoyed!


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